Things I Think- Halloween Candy

There are a few things I'd like to say about candy this Halloween season. Pay attention all of you who are staying home to give out candy to trick or treaters.

I think that old, funky candy and treats that have been laying around the house for more than 6 months are NOT okay to hand out. Kids don't like taffy that has become hard as a rock or brittle pieces of licorice. Neither do 27 year olds, come to think of it.

I think that the best bet for anyone handing out candy is to get name brand candy that is easily recognizable. Snickers, Twix, Skittles are among the top in my book. Just because Bit-O-Honey is technically a name brand doesn't make it taste good. The same thing goes for Circus Peanuts.

I think that people who tell you to beware of razor blades in apples and brownies are nuts. Has anyone ever ingested a razor blade? None of my friends ever did- except "Bloody Throat" Frank.

I also think that the main concern from homemade treats is not so much razor blades or poison, but rather the odd curly black hair. Ew.

I think toothbrushes or pencils are super lame "treats." What are you, my dentist or my teacher? If you are it's still lame.

I think the best trick or treat experience I ever had was going to the house that gave out full size candy bars.

I think kids without costumes don't deserve candy.

I think if you refuse to give kids without costumes candy, they will probably egg and toilet paper your house.